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The Home Where Christians Live

by Micky Galloway

Paul wrote that a man seeking the office of bishop must be “one that ruleth well his own house, having (his) children in subjection with all gravity; (but if a man knoweth not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?)” (I Timothy 3:4-5). What constitutes a good home? Certainly not brick, mortar, wood, and glass. There have been good homes in tents, even mud huts. Unfortunately, there are many people living in nice houses who do not have good homes. Remember we can destroy the church within the four walls of our homes.

A good home begins with a commitment. A good home must begin with a clear understanding of commitment toward God and commitment toward the marriage. Marriage is for life and should not be entered without serious thought. God hates divorce (Malachi 2:15-16) and allows only one exception, i.e. the innocent one may put away their companion because of fornication. Then and only then can the innocent one remarry without sin (Matthew 5:32; 19:9). Marriages fail when there is a lack of Bible teaching on this subject or a lack of respect for God and His word. We must respect God and His law if we want a good home.

For a good home to exist both parents must be FAITHFUL Christians. (This is accommodative language of course, for actually there is no other kind of Christian.) It is a neglect of responsibility to children to deprive them of this blessing. It may be necessary to deprive them of toys, luxuries, or advanced education, but don’t deprive them of a mother and father that are faithful to the Lord. Young people, marry someone who wants to go to heaven more than anything else. They will help you have a happy home. Convert your friend before you marry. Unfortunately, many homes are wreaked with heartache because both parents are not united in spiritual things for themselves or for their children. This constant division will destroy the souls of our children and will create tremendous stress between the parents.

A good home has a husband and father who is the head of his household (Ephesians 5:23). He is not to be a figurehead or a puppet, but the head. This means he must be the spiritual leader as well. This does not mean he is a brut or authoritarian ruler (cf. I Peter 3:7). He is to love his wife and honor and cherish her. In this he teaches his children much about marriage as well as the importance of the church, worship to God, Bible study, etc.

A good home is one where the wife and mother is the “queen.” She is recognized and respected by both her husband and her children for her worth. “Her children rise up, and call her blessed; Her husband (also), and he praiseth her, (saying): Many daughters have done worthily, But thou excellest them all” (Proverbs 31:28-29). She is described as the “keeper at home” (Titus 2:5). Many women who have abandoned the training of their children or have left them unattended have contributed to juvenile delinquency and divorce. In this they rob the church of the next generation of their faithful children. Remember “the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.”

A good home is a home where parents recognize and fulfill their God given responsibility to “train” their children (Ephesians 6:4). This means spending TIME with our children in Bible study and prayer as well as living a proper life before them. In spending time with our children it is important that we consider proper recreation for them in the home. This is not the responsibility of the church! Many parents do not know who their children’s friends are or where their children are. Spiritual training is a must. Do you spend time reading and teaching God’s word in the presence of your children? It doesn't take long for our little ones to know what is our priority. Let’s take advantage of the opportunity teach them both verbally as well as by our example. While they are young, ours will be the greatest influence in their lives.

A good home is a home where children are taught to obey. “Children obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right” (Ephesians 6:1). The expression “for this is right” implies teaching them obedience to God. God is the ultimate one who determines what is right. “Harken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old” (Proverbs 23:22). Children are a blessing to parents who will teach them to obey. Respect for authority begins in the home. If children are not taught to obey in the home, they will not grow up to respect and obey God.

These characteristics yield cooperation, harmony, peace, joy, and love. There is not bickering, arguing, strife, bitterness, etc. It is from this kind of home that elders are selected. If our homes are in trouble, so is the church. It is robbed of valuable leadership and the strong support of godly families. What kind of home do you have?

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